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 Posted: Wed Apr 16, 2008 5:15 pm
A lone crystal tear
Creeps away from my eye, and watches you leave
While watching me die
Silently it rolls down
Over skin you used to touch, and burns it away
You used to love me so much
A shadow slinks over
Like a dark black sea
The closer you get towards the light
The more your shadow covers me
The tear hits the ground and shatters like glass
You turn around to see me
Only to look past.
I wrote this poem right after my boyfriend at the time left me. It was only about a month and a half ago, and still hurts. I would love to hear what you think about this poem, and please tell me what I should fix about it. 3nodding
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Posted: Fri Apr 18, 2008 4:45 pm
Wow....that is touching....You should really see about submitting something for publishing...I think you could make it
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Posted: Fri Apr 18, 2008 10:55 pm
I dunno. I don't think I'm good enough for publishing, and I have no idea where I would do that.
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Posted: Sat Apr 19, 2008 9:27 am
there are good visuals for this poem. everything can be seen automatically instead of having t think about it. while there are times where being direct doesn't work it works well for this poem.
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